What happened to my sweet little angel helper girl?
Clare just poked James in the eye because I was nursing him while she wanted to play with me. Not sure how I should respond to this lovingly. As it is, she just got a swat and sent to her room until she could come out to say she's sorry. Any mommy tips out there?
4 comments:
Here is a nanny tip I learned from a mommy:
When kids hit, push, etc, they are rewarded with immediate attention (even if negative). So instead of giving them that reward, tend to the "hurt" child first making sure it's obvious they are the one that is getting your attention (even if it's something minor). Then you can calmly turn back towards the aggressor and deal out their consequence, talking to, whatever is appropriate for the incident.
I also find that it helps you take a moment to calm down if you are losing your patience, which I often do!
Hope that helps. :)
Yes! Thank you...I know she's looking for attention and I don't want to give it to her, but I don't want to ignore the bad behavior either. That sounds great.
I like what Nichole said. Also, one thing I do when Avila starts to act out is I tell her it looks like she needs some "mama-time." So, instead of hurting me or someone else to get my attention, we have a little code word she uses when she wants this mama only time. A code word could be something like "code blue!" or "mama-time." But the only rules are that you can tell her to wait if you are in the middle of something you simply can't stop (nursing for example) and that it can't be over-used (you can determine how much is too much). That way she knows that if she really needs your full attention she can have it. I hope I explained it OK! Good luck, you're such a great mom :)
I totally agree with you Kris; what she really wants is my attention and probably the snuggle time that James is monopolizing at the moment. Funny that such an independent little girl has her moments when she just wants to be my baby again...She and I are actually working on the "mommy time" thing. whenever she begins what looks like it could be a cranky stretch I ask her if she needs to snuggle for a little bit. Trying to get her to the point where she can recognize the need and just say, "Mommy, snuggle," instead of behaving badly to get attention. Argh. Thanks for the support and suggestions. Really appreciate it.
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