Today was one.
It started at about 2:30 AM with Clare deciding that it was time to be awake and playing. She would NOT go back to sleep. So I finally just brought her in bed and laid her down and tried to ignore her. It must have worked after a while because she finally fell back asleep.
Needless to say, I was a little tired this morning and my normal early-morning wake up did not sound very appealing. So I slept in a bit with Clare and Tom (he had to work swing shift today). The sleeping in part was great, but that also meant that I didn't have my normal morning prayer time. I thought, "Oh well, I can just do my meditation while Clare is taking a nap."
Nap time came and went, and she was not having it.
"Oh, well," I thought. "I have a Holy Hour today, I'll spend some quiet time with Christ then."
By this time I was annoyed at the whole lack-of-nap thing, and Clare was cranky.
So I got her in the car, thinking that she'd probably fall asleep in the car on the way and leave me in peace for a whole hour.
We got in to the Church, and everything was OK. I got her in her Ergo and let her nurse for a few minutes while we walked around in the back. Things were going well until she ripped the nursing cover off and decided that she was NOT going to fall asleep, and wasn't afraid to let everyone within a 10-mile radius know it.
So we went outside for a little bit to see if the fresh air and a walk would make her fall asleep (she so desperately wanted to, but was fighting it!). As soon as she had calmed down a little bit, I tried to sneak back inside for my quiet time with Christ. She started crying again. Back outside.
After 3 or 4 attempts, I realized that I was probably more of a nuisance to the others inside who were trying to have their quiet time with Christ. So we packed up and got in the car, where she fell asleep after about 5 minutes of driving.
When we got home, I didn't have the heart to move her and wake her up from her much-needed nap, so I closed the garage door, opened the car doors, and propped open the door leading from the house to the garage, and let her take a 2-hour nap in the car.
We were both much happier after her nap, and my mom's visit tonight came at just the right time.
I'm hoping that Christ knows that my heart was there with Him all day, despite the many things that seemed to prevent me from spending time with Him.
3 comments:
Sometimes I feel like the Lord is telling us "There's more than one way to spend time with Me" and that sometimes the best way to spend time with him to spend a day with our children or loved ones knowing that it is He who has given them to us to take care.
Carrie - here is a good quote I found in the book Holiness for Housewives by Hubert van Zeller "If this morning is going to be of any use to God, it must be spent in a way that shows that I accept every moment of it as coming from His hand. It is not so much that I must sanctify it as that I must let it sanctify me."
And don't you just have to laugh at the things we said before we had kids? How we just thought they would sit quietly while we were in Adoration or Mass?
And wouldn't it be nice if we could set up our own terms of how to achieve holiness?...But these little people, they have their own plans of how to make us holy! :)
I love you Carrie!
-Cheri
Cheri, funny that you quoted Holiness for Housewives...because I read it again (or at least part of it) after that day. One part that always strikes me is when he says that we are called to be holy not in spite of, but because of, all the demands on our time and energy and patience. I felt like such a failure that day, because that one line just kept running over and over in my head...
Thanks to both of you for your encouragment.
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